Just for Pun

I borrowed this from a friend:

• When you get a bladder infection urine trouble.
• Broken pencils are pointless.
• I tried to catch some fog, but I mist.
• What do you call a dinosaur with an extensive vocabulary? A thesaurus.
• England has no kidney bank, but it does have a Liverpool.
• I used to be a banker, but then I lost interest.
• I dropped out of communism class because of lousy Marx.
• All the toilets in New York’s police stations have been stolen. The police have nothing to go on.
• I got a job at a bakery because I kneaded dough.
• Haunted French pancakes give me the crêpes.
• Velcro – what a rip off!
• A cartoonist was found dead in his home. Details are sketchy.
• Venison for dinner again? Oh deer!
• The earthquake in Washington obviously was the government’s fault.
• Be kind to your dentist. He has fillings, too.

Source: Kim Bolsover - Image Consultant Training Courses

London Paralympics 2012 Were An Education

Here is an outstanding article reflecting on the Paralympics:
http://www.telegraph.co.uk/sport/olympics/paralympic-sport/9530103/Paralympic-Games-Inside-the-theatre-of-miracles.html

The Paralympics were an amazing and enlightening experience that we were privileged to host in London. We have lived it, loved it and I hope broadened our minds. I know

 I have.

This was not just a sports event but one of psychology, personal development and education which caught and held our attention and admiration across generations.

Only being able to buy tickets for the Paralympics seemed like a consolation option when the last available Olympics tickets were too expensive but when we reached the Olympic Park pn Monday 3/9, we shared the buzz. Inside the Olympics Stadium we witnessed what people can do with the right attitude: 

1. Taking off a prosthetic leg to hop over the high jump? The Pole won the Bronze whilst the Gold medal went to a Fijian who hopped over 1.54m, the first time Fiji had ever won a medal. 
2. GB's Mickey Bushell winning Gold and setting a new Paralympic record in the T53 100m wheelchair final. The deafening crowd roaring him on then cheering as he received his medal and we sang "God Save the Queen". 
3. The Polish woman who set a 6m world record in the long jump.
4. The Argentinian who ran 5000m with a sighted guide? He came in 2 laps and 4 minutes behind the winners but we cheered him for his determination. He can say proudly, "I ran in a Paralympics final." 

Will we ever forget a swimmer with no arms and only one leg winning Gold? How do you even do that? Blind people playing 5-a-side football? Wheelchairs becoming dodgem cars and tipping over in wheelchair rugby?

Every Paralympian athlete deserves our respect for using their "dis-ability" as a reason to be able to do something extraordinary. They are indeed THE SUPERHUMANS shown in Channel 4's poster.

Antonia Harrison challenges people to Change their Minds to Save Their Life using powerful hypnosis and NLP.   "We are boxed in by the boundary conditions of our thinking." - Einstein

A Sweet Lesson on Patience

A sweet lesson on patience seen on Facebook today with  1,253,851 likes and 248,039 shares.  Please take a few minutes to read.

A NYC Taxi driver wrote:

I arrived at the address and honked the horn. After waiting a few minutes I honked again. Since this was going to be my last ride of my shift I thought about just driving away, but instead I put the car in park and walked up to the door and knocked.. 'Just a minute', answered a frail, elderly voice. I could hear something being dragged across the floor.

After a long pause, the door opened. A small woman in her 90's stood before me. She was wearing a print dress and a pillbox hat with a veil pinned on it, like somebody out of a 1940's movie.

By her side was a small nylon suitcase. The apartment looked as if no one had lived in it for years. All the furniture was covered with sheets.

There were no clocks on the walls, no knickknacks or utensils on the counters. In the corner was a cardboard box filled with photos and glassware.

'Would you carry my bag out to the car?' she said. I took the suitcase to the cab, then returned to assist the woman.

She took my arm and we walked slowly toward the curb.

She kept thanking me for my kindness. 'It's nothing', I told her.. 'I just try to treat my passengers the way I would want my mother to be treated.'

'Oh, you're such a good boy, she said. When we got in the cab, she gave me an address and then asked, 'Could you drive through downtown?'

'It's not the shortest way,' I answered quickly..

'Oh, I don't mind,' she said. 'I'm in no hurry. I'm on my way to a hospice.

I looked in the rear-view mirror. Her eyes were glistening. 'I don't have any family left,' she continued in a soft voice..'The doctor says I don't have very long.' I quietly reached over and shut off the meter.

'What route would you like me to take?' I asked.

For the next two hours, we drove through the city. She showed me the building where she had once worked as an elevator operator.

We drove through the neighborhood where she and her husband had lived when they were newlyweds.  She had me pull up in front of a furniture warehouse that had once been a ballroom where she had gone dancing as a girl.

Sometimes she'd ask me to slow in front of a particular building or corner and would sit staring into the darkness, saying nothing.

As the first hint of sun was creasing the horizon, she suddenly said, 'I'm tired.Let's go now'.
We drove in silence to the address she had given me. It was a low building, like a small convalescent home, with a driveway that passed under a portico.

Two orderlies came out to the cab as soon as we pulled up. They were solicitous and intent, watching her every move.  They must have been expecting her.

I opened the trunk and took the small suitcase to the door. The woman was already seated in a wheelchair.

'How much do I owe you?' She asked, reaching into her purse.

'Nothing,' I said

'You have to make a living,' she answered.

'There are other passengers,' I responded.

Almost without thinking, I bent and gave her a hug.She held onto me tightly.

'You gave an old woman a little moment of joy,' she said. 'Thank you.'

I squeezed her hand, and then walked into the dim morning light.. Behind me, a door shut.It was the sound of the closing of a life..

I didn't pick up any more passengers that shift. I drove aimlessly lost in thought. For the rest of that day,I could hardly talk.What if that woman had gotten an angry driver,or one who was impatient to end his shift? What if I had refused to take the run, or had honked once, then driven away?

On a quick review, I don't think that I have done anything more important in my life.

We're conditioned to think that our lives revolve around great moments.

But great moments often catch us unaware-beautifully wrapped in what others may consider a small one.

Il Divo Release Come What May in Spanish

Wonderful Il Divo have just released a new album "Wicked Game"

I am a fan of Baz Luhrmann's film "Moulin Rouge" and on their new album, pop-opera Il Divo do a cover of "Come What May" in Spanish called "Te Amare". I am in Heaven!

Download the MP3 of Come What May (Te Amare)

Here are the lyrics:

Lyrics | Il Divo lyrics - Come What May lyrics

On this page http://www.lyricsmode.com/lyrics/i/il_divo/come_what_may.html you can download a "Come What May" ringtone and link to lyrics of Il Divo songs.

Buy Il Divo - Wicked Game

To date, IL DIVO have sold more than 25 million albums and have the only classical crossover album, Ancora, to ever enter the Billboard Top 200 at #1.

See Il Divo on tour at Il Divo.com

.

I Had The Strangest Dream Whilst Taking a Catnap

I had the strangest dream whilst taking a catnap during working hours.

Next to my bed was a carpeted seating area with lots of cushions. Outside of this was a small flat roof which was overflowing with rainwater although it seemed to me there had been no rain recently and it was pleasantly sunny. The rainwater did not go down the drainpipe presumably because it was blocked by leaves and I had not cleared the blockage. Instead the rainwater was coming into my bedroom via a ventilation brick. I saw the water which was a couple of inches deep and was moving the cushions away when I heard a sound in the adjacent store room.

I found there a workman and asked him what he thought he was doing and how had he got into my house? He replied, “Well, I’m working with Mark.” Mark was a carpenter who specialized in marquetry. I had hired him to do some decorative woodwork in my living room. At that point, Mark walked sheepishly into my bedroom, apologized that he had not told me that the other man would be there and he had used my key rather than first check whether I was at home.

Suddenly, I heard my son laughing and playing in the garden and remembered that he had a friend with him. I looked out of the window and saw them running out of the garden down a side road. I called out to him but he did not hear. I left the workmen and ran after my son and his friend.

At the bottom of the road were ordinary houses but today the area had been transformed into an outdoors convention of The Salvation Army, the people who wear uniforms and play religious music and preach the Gospel. They can often be seen in town centres around Christmas when people give them money for the poor. In fact, I saw a TV commercial for them yesterday hoping to raise money for families who could not afford to buy any Christmas presents, let alone the ones their children really wanted. Meanwhile my children will receive an excess of LEGO and other toys which they want.

There were some stands set up providing drinks and food for these people but not the loud, garish burgers and chips type of stalls. They were serving plain warm English food like stew and bowls of soup.

This chain of events is symbolic to me. First, I was sleeping during working hours. On the one hand I know I should not have been doing this although I accept that a short sleep is better than a couple of coffees when tired. I know tonight that I have two hours of driving and an evening of networking so want to be refreshed.

I thought it had been sunny and had not noticed the rain which was now overflowing. There is a financial crisis on which I tend to think of affecting other people, not me, due to my mindset. At the same time I am dipping into capital rather than doing the necessary work to create income through different sources.

I was spending money on decorative work rather than ensuring the foundations were strong ie allowing the flooding to happen by not clearing the drainpipes. Beauty is a high value of mine and I like to look at beautiful things. Sometimes I fail to see the reality because I am so focused on what I want to see.

My son and his friend were alone yet I was responsible for them both. Why was I sleeping instead of supervising them? I am often doing my things but not being there for my children, especially my younger son, as the older one receives more attention through help with his school studies.

The Salvation Army were gently, in a non-intrusive way, reminding me of my soul, my spiritual side.

All very vivid and clearly lots of messages.

©Antonia Harrison 2011 from Personal Development in the 21st Century

Don't Cry Because It's Over

“Don't cry because it's over. Smile because it happened.” - Dr Seuss

Stand Up For Sprouts at Christmas

http://standupforsprouts.org/

In a recent survey, nobody liked sprouts.

Every year, millions of sprouts are mercilessly rounded up and boiled for no other reason than that’s the way it’s always been.

It’s time to put a stop to this barbaric practice.

P.S. My sons and I actually like sprouts. My youngest son even craves them!

The Wrong Email Address - Brilliant

A Scottish couple decided to go to Spain to thaw out during a particularly icy winter. They planned to stay at the same hotel where they spent their honeymoon 20 years earlier. Due to hectic schedules, it was difficult to coordinate their travel schedules. So the husband left Glasgow and flew to Barcelona on Thursday, with his wife flying down the following day. The husband checked into the hotel. There was a computer in his room, so he decided to send an email to his wife. However, he accidentally left out one letter in her email address, and without realizing his error, sent the email.

Meanwhile, somewhere in Blackpool, a widow had just returned home from her husband's funeral. He was a minister who died following a heart attack. The widow decided to check her email expecting messages from relatives and friends After reading the first message, she screamed and fainted. The widow's son rushed into the room , found his mother on the floor, and saw the computer screen which read:

To: My Loving Wife

Subject: I've Arrived

I know you're surprised to hear from me. They have computers here now and you are allowed to send emails to your loved ones. I've just arrived and have been checked in. I see that everything has been prepared for your arrival tomorrow. Looking forward to seeing you then! Hope your journey is as uneventful as mine was.

P.S. F***ing hot down here!

Euro Zone - a story about how the bailout package works

Seen on Facebook today:

It is a slow day in a little Greek Village. The rain is beating down and the streets are deserted. Times are tough, everybody is in debt, and everybody lives on credit.

On this particular day a rich German tourist is driving through the village, stops at the local hotel and lays a €100 note on the desk, telling the hotel owner he wants to inspect the rooms upstairs in order to pick one to spend the night.

The owner gives him some keys and, as soon as the visitor has walked upstairs, the hotelier grabs the €100 note and runs next door to pay his debt to the butcher.

The butcher takes the €100 note and runs down the street to repay his debt to the pig farmer.

The pig farmer takes the €100 note and heads off to pay his bill at the supplier of feed and fuel.

The guy at the Farmers' Co-op takes the €100 note and runs to pay his drinks bill at the Taverna.

The publican slips the money along to the local prostitute drinking at the bar, who has also been facing hard times and has had to offer him "services" on credit.

The hooker then rushes to the hotel and pays off her room bill to the hotel owner with the €100 note.

The hotel proprietor then places the €100 note back on the counter so the rich traveller will not suspect anything.

At that moment the traveller comes down the stairs, picks up the €100 note, states that the rooms are not satisfactory, pockets the money, and leaves town. No one produced anything. No one earned anything. However, the whole village is now out of debt and looking to the future with a lot more optimism.

So now you know how the bailout package works!

Top Five Regrets of the Dying

I saw this article about a a powerful book by a wonderful woman named Bronnie Ware which focuses in on the actual voiced regrets of people she encountered when they were dying. Powerful stuff – go and pick up the book! Here’s a small excerpt:

For many years I worked in palliative care. My patients were those who had gone home to die. Some incredibly special times were shared. I was with them for the last three to twelve weeks of their lives.

People grow a lot when they are faced with their own mortality. I learnt never to underestimate someone’s capacity for growth. Some changes were phenomenal. Each experienced a variety of emotions, as expected, denial, fear, anger, remorse, more denial and eventually acceptance. Every single patient found their peace before they departed though, every one of them.

When questioned about any regrets they had or anything they would do differently, common themes surfaced again and again. Here are the most common five:

1. I wish I’d had the courage to live a life true to myself, not the life others expected of me.

This was the most common regret of all. When people realise that their life is almost over and look back clearly on it, it is easy to see how many dreams have gone unfulfilled. Most people had not honoured even a half of their dreams and had to die knowing that it was due to choices they had made, or not made.

It is very important to try and honour at least some of your dreams along the way. From the moment that you lose your health, it is too late. Health brings a freedom very few realise, until they no longer have it.

2. I wish I didn’t work so hard.

This came from every male patient that I nursed. They missed their children’s youth and their partner’s companionship. Women also spoke of this regret. But as most were from an older generation, many of the female patients had not been breadwinners. All of the men I nursed deeply regretted spending so much of their lives on the treadmill of a work existence.

By simplifying your lifestyle and making conscious choices along the way, it is possible to not need the income that you think you do. And by creating more space in your life, you become happier and more open to new opportunities, ones more suited to your new lifestyle.

3. I wish I’d had the courage to express my feelings.

Many people suppressed their feelings in order to keep peace with others. As a result, they settled for a mediocre existence and never became who they were truly capable of becoming. Many developed illnesses relating to the bitterness and resentment they carried as a result.

We cannot control the reactions of others. However, although people may initially react when you change the way you are by speaking honestly, in the end it raises the relationship to a whole new and healthier level. Either that or it releases the unhealthy relationship from your life. Either way, you win.

4. I wish I had stayed in touch with my friends.

Often they would not truly realise the full benefits of old friends until their dying weeks and it was not always possible to track them down. Many had become so caught up in their own lives that they had let golden friendships slip by over the years. There were many deep regrets about not giving friendships the time and effort that they deserved. Everyone misses their friends when they are dying.

It is common for anyone in a busy lifestyle to let friendships slip. But when you are faced with your approaching death, the physical details of life fall away. People do want to get their financial affairs in order if possible. But it is not money or status that holds the true importance for them. They want to get things in order more for the benefit of those they love. Usually though, they are too ill and weary to ever manage this task. It is all comes down to love and relationships in the end. That is all that remains in the final weeks, love and relationships.

5. I wish that I had let myself be happier.

This is a surprisingly common one. Many did not realise until the end that happiness is a choice. They had stayed stuck in old patterns and habits. The so-called ‘comfort’ of familiarity overflowed into their emotions, as well as their physical lives. Fear of change had them pretending to others, and to their selves, that they were content. When deep within, they longed to laugh properly and have silliness in their life again.

When you are on your deathbed, what others think of you is a long way from your mind. How wonderful to be able to let go and smile again, long before you are dying.

Life is a choice. It is YOUR life. Choose consciously, choose wisely, choose honestly. Choose happiness.

POST YOUR QUESTIONS OR COMMENTS BELOW

P.S. Did this article stir something in your soul (like it did with mine)? Let’s talk. I’ve worked with many clients who have the same questions — and we developed a successful plan to turn that around. If you’re not a client . . . pick up the phone and call me. You can find me at http://www.AntoniaHarrison.com

article by Rich Gee

Be Grateful for our Children

My little boy asked me if it was difficult for me to look after him and his older brother. I gave him my knee-jerk answer in the affirmative. But then I thought about my answer and brought up the subject the next day on the school run. I told him there are times when my patience runs out, when I am tired, when they make a mess, when they don't listen or simply disobey. when they are simply too demanding, when I think of the sacrifices I have made and continue making. All of that is true but there is a yin and yang in everything. For every action in the universe there is a reaction. I could dwell on the negatives which would make me more tired, more stressed. Or I could think of the positives, of the joy, the fun, the proud moments and all the little moments when having children is the most wonderful gift anyone could imagine. There is so much to be grateful for about my boys.

"The Secret" reminds us that if we dwell on the things we don´t want we shall only reap more of what we don´t want. Instead focus on what we are grateful for, really develop a sense of gratitude and we shall see the good rather than bring ourselves down by focussing on the bad.

I recommend you visit my blog post Importance of Keeping a Gratitude Journal at http://the-secret-and-law-of-attraction.blogspot.com/2007/10/importance-of-keeping-gratitude-journal.html< This has helped me so much. In one of Oprah's final programmes she mentioned the Gratitude Journal and what a profound effect it has had on her life. The book starts on 1 January so now is a great time to give yourself and your loved ones this book - the best Christmas present which will last a lifetime.

Wanted: Internal Communications Specialist

1. Internal Communications: Implement the standards of internal communications in line with a Universal roadmap and priorities. Adapt internal communications to the current local requirements. Responsible for internal channels and memorable interactive events.

2. Change Management: Through internal communications support change management processes and programs coordinating them lightly and closely with the creative sources. Advocate and promote the development of an even state of mind. Support adapting and implementing abundance for all on Earth, worldwide binding principles, codes and standards, like Vision and Values, in such a way that they are understood and lived by all participants at all levels in the world. Build a close relationship with a mentor and guides to develop Internal Communication programs that will achieve a sustainable value contribution and build a strong internal conviction.

3. Brand Management: Manage the universal brand operationally on the inside and in close cooperation with yellow. Encourage internal and external communications and events that determine and increase beauty on the planet.

4. Messaging : Invite internal messaging that combines a cosmic “message house” material with local heart/mind messaging to co-create briefing materials that will dazzle and inspire. Design and teach with sketches, doodles and documents for various participating audiences to build message consistency and skill.

5. Stakeholders and Media Relations: Establishing and cultivating respectful relations with all beings seen and unseen, focusing on close proximity audiences. Able to be a spokesperson for love. Play and organize interviews, film and photo shoots in Cape-Town with key listeners, thought thinkers, decision makers and friends. Give prizes and thank you gifts.

6. Communications: Effective communications plan that works with ancient wisdom and the corresponding strength to apply universal love. Co-develop and communicate the availability of helpful tools and training for use in internal communication and offer to the world at large. Participate in nature walks with business associates and senior management. These plans should blend with virtues such as compassion, tolerance and patience and understanding.

7. Sustainability : Support gardens and people at one with the natural environment in the communication of sustainability strategy and activities.

8. Management: Facilitator of a team, mind, body and soul, bringing added value, sharing best practises and lessons learned, developing stories to be used in global communications channels. Start immediately.

From a Henkel headhunting ad.

How to Make Perfect Hard Boiled Eggs

Here are our three chickens. They give us delicious eggs so I wanted to know how to cook perfect hard boiled eggs and found this advice on a blog.




Cook time: 12 minutes

If you want hard boiled eggs that are easy to peel, make sure they are several days old. If this is Easter time, and everyone is buying their eggs at the last minute, buy your eggs 5 days in advance of boiling. Hard boiling farm fresh eggs will invariably lead to eggs that are difficult to peel. If you have boiled a batch that are difficult to peel, try putting them in the refrigerator for a few days; they should be easier to peel then. If you need to hard cook fresh eggs, and want them easy to peel, steaming the eggs works well. Even fresh eggs steamed for 20 minutes will be easy to peel.

METHOD
1 Put the eggs in a single layer in a saucepan, covered by at least 1-2" of cold water. Starting with cold water and gently bringing the eggs to a boil will help keep them from cracking. Some people add a tablespoon of vinegar to the water to help keep the egg whites from running out of any eggs that happen to crack while cooking, but some people find that the vinegar affects the taste. Adding a half teaspoon of salt is thought to help both with the preventing of cracking and making the eggs easier to peel. Put the burner on high and bring the eggs to a boil. As soon as the water starts to boil, remove the pan from the heat for a few seconds.

2 Reduce the heat to low, return the pan to the burner. Let simmer for one minute. (Note I usually skip this step because I don't notice the eggs boiling until they've been boiling for at least a minute! Also, if you are using an electric stove with a coil element, you can just turn off the heat. There is enough residual heat in the coil to keep the eggs simmering for a minute.)

3 After a minute, remove the pan from the heat, cover, and let sit for 12 minutes. If you are doing a large batch of eggs, after 10 minutes you can check for doneness by sacrificing one egg, removing it with a slotted spoon, running it under cold water, and cutting it open. If it isn't done, cook the other eggs a minute or two longer. The eggs should be done perfectly at 10 minutes, but sometimes, depending on the shape of the pan, the size of the eggs, the number of eggs compared to the amount of water, and how cooked you like them, it can take a few minutes more. When you find the right time that works for you given your pan, the size of eggs you usually buy, the type of stove top you have, stick with it.

I also find that it is very hard to overcook eggs using this method. I can let the eggs sit, covered, for up to 15-20 minutes without the eggs getting overcooked.
4 Either remove the eggs with a slotted spoon and place them into a bowl of ice water (this is if you have a lot of eggs) OR strain out the water from the pan, fill the pan with cold water, strain again, fill again, until the eggs cool down a bit. Once cooled, strain the water from the eggs. Store the eggs in a covered container (eggs can release odors) in the refrigerator. They should be eaten within 5 days.

Source: Elise - Simply Recipes

The Purpose of Life is to be Happy

“I believe that the very purpose of life is to be happy. From the very core of our being, we desire contentment. In my own limited experience I have found that the more we care for the happiness of others, the greater is our own sense of well-being. Cultivating a close, warmhearted feeling for others automatically puts the mind at ease. It helps remove whatever fears or insecurities we may have and gives us the strength to cope with any obstacles we encounter. It is the principal source of success in life. Since we are not solely material creatures, it is a mistake to place all our hopes for happiness on external development alone. The key is to develop inner peace.” - Christopher Howard

Regain Control of Your Life

Regain control of your life and your results so that you can begin to live with passion, purpose and power.